Being Uncomfortable (this Cali move tho!)

Wassup my people?

How areeeee you? How was da weekend? How is it August btw?

A few updates to share:

We moved into a little bungalow spot in Venice. We decided Venice vs. Santa Monica to be closer to the water, and to be closer to Abbott Kinney, and have a more Brooklyn vibe that Venice supposedly has. I have a full bedroom with a door y'all! #ballin

We are 1/2 block from the beach (!) which is cool, but also you don’t get ANY service because you’re so close to the water. So I’m like struggling to get stuff done in this coffee shop (Intelligentsia) they are playing Radiohead WAY too loud and why are there so many people that come to coffee shops to look at Facebook? IDK. 

So for my job, I'm working remotely, for the same small company out of London that I worked for in NYC. While I work with the team, I can do much of what I do from LA, so that’s what’s going on there. I know a few people asked about this, like how to ask to work remotely etc., and basically I built a business case for it and pitched it. My company is rather lax and cool about things like that so it was fine. I’m grateful. I’m sort of nervous about the whole deal though, like away from everything and maybe going f’ing crazy/not being as productive as possible - any tips, please let me know! I asked this one chick I used to work with in Chicago, and she said, ‘the key for me, is to put on a bra. That’s how I shift into work mode from home’ - LOL.

Prepare for a DGAF - but I got a WHACK ass haircut last week in NYC - from my normal babe Annastasia, but I wasn’t specific at ALL about what I wanted and we were chatting, scissors were flying and I ended up with the Rachel from Friends (circa 92) and have no idea how to style a mom cut. So I guess what I learned there, is to be super specific with what I want and not just I want it short and do whatever. Because when you get a haircut, you do have an idea of what you want, so basically find a picture and show it. I'll try to snap a picture soon so you can laugh at me.

I’m also super excited to be working on some cool collabs with people/other bloggers that I’m excited to share with you soon. 

So one of the things I’ve been thinking about on the move, was how you just like freak the fuck out when you do something radical, like a move, or a big change in your life. 

One of the reasons why I wanted L.A. was to add to my life experiences (which are to go everywhere, meet everyone and see everything). It makes the most sense for Justin here, and I want to travel on this side of the world (Asia, Australia, etc.). 

I remember living in Chicago, I always said, just because it’s good doesn’t mean it can’t get better so I also applied that to NYC and now to L.A. 

I try to not hold onto things, even if they’re really good, because no matter what things change. People, places and things - everything.

Upon arriving, I’m like running around the new city, trying to furnish the new place, that we couldn’t move into, until the weekend (on Saturday). We have zero pieces of furniture, we no mattress, nothing. Just my 11 boxes of clothes to Justin's 1 - LOL. 

So being here, there’s really nothing similar about it to New York City. I think there’s diversity of people, but other than that it’s not much like anywhere I’ve ever lived. I have a good solid group of friends already here but the network isn’t as established as it was in New York City, or Chicago (my real OG crew). 

Sunday, I was just going to do all my stuff to get the apartment set, Target, Whole Foods, everything, BLAH BLAH BLAH and I’m feeling really anxious as if I need to have a full life here - RIGHT NOW. I'm thinking of all the things I want to accomplish here and that I need to do. 

In my state of feeling stressed out, and out of my element, I wasn't feeling how I want to feel - I was uncomfortable. Nothing is the same as it was last week and it’s really daunting to reestablish your life somewhere new, a 5 hour flight away from where you were previously.

FYI if you're wondering what Justin's doing, the entire time is just repeating, "You're 2 blessed 2 be stressed dude". LOL. 

So I’m thinking of all the ways that I can get rid of how off I felt. Breathing, maybe Yoga, talking to friends on the phone.

All good options to alter the discomfort. 

I had a thought, back to this talk I listened to regarding welcoming those sort of feels, led by Tara Brach

If you don't know Tara she fuckin' rules. She's a meditation teacher and therapist, who has a bomb podcast and class series in Bethesda. She also wrote a book that's really good, called Radical Acceptance.

She talks about inviting those feelings of discomfort and exploring them. So not necessarily looking for things that make you uncomfortable, but recognizing when those feelings happen and instead of finding anyway possible to rid yourself of those feelings, just to sit with it. Calmly acknowledge the place you are, and explore it. 

(Get ready y'all I'm on my next level shit today of #deepthoughts)

There’s a movement as a society to keep as far away from discomfort as possible, when life is easy, without any struggle is always usually the goal. No risks, means no rocking the boat. But there is something to be said about the experience of change and discomfort. To learn about yourself in more situations than just ‘life is going perfect’.  Tara Brach talks about it in her book, and in a few blog posts, Inviting Mara to Tea, and Pain is Not Wrong.

While fear of discomfort is a natural human reaction, it is particularly dominant in our culture where we consider this as bad, or wrong. Mistrusting our bodies, we’re assuming that whatever removes pain is the right thing to do. In our society’s cultural trance, rather than a natural phenomenon, discomfort and pain is regarded as the enemy. Pain is the messenger we try to kill, not something we allow and embrace.
— Tara Brach

Often people have a good thing, whether it be a situation at work, a place or even a relationship and they cling to it, hoping it will never change. It's almost like a fear and mistrust in the universe that it could potentially give you something - better.

I'm meditating on this shit all week baby.

Let me know if you have any tips for moving, any favorite spots in Venice, or advice on working remote. So down to hear it.

Have a good week.


Krista xx

Pictures via Santa Monica park, Downtown L.A. and Abbott Kinney street art.