You guys want me to talk about moving again?!?!??! I know, I know. But moving makes you honestly really think. You purge stuff you don't need, you realize what matters, how annoying lugging shit around is, how having a clean slate allows you to start fresh....
So I'm not talking about it specifically, but since moving, I’ve been really thinking about a fork in the road type scenario. A choice that all people make either concisely or unconsciously in their life.
*Looks up slowly at the stars*
I feel like I should preface this post with like, the road less traveled quote written in cursive over a floral design. LOL.
I have been pondering this all the time. If you’ve been on the phone with me for the past month, this is something I am sure I have asked your opinion on. #deepchats #heyalixx
Staying in one place, for a long time (like your whole life, or where you grew up) and having the ability to foster deep connections and relationships with those people around you. Time allows you to do that. Your commonalities (based on your location and history together) allow you to do that. Through this time you’ve weeded out the extras and the bullshit and you’ve got loyal ass people in your squad.
It’s really a beautiful thing.
I know people like that. Grew up in their hometown, maybe left for college, came back, and have a deep sense of community and connection with where they grew up. Their desire to leave, if they ever have it is satisfied through possible vacations, of which they look forward to going back to the life they’ve known for quite a long time.
The other choice is not to stay in one place for a long period of time, to continue to see and experience all that you can while building relationships with those you meet along the way, as deeply as you can. Put blankly it’s a choice of experiences over comfort, and self growth over anything. It could essentially be seen as selfish. It’s choosing to see more, do more, be more and always keep it moving. Although you’ll have more stories to tell, it may be harder to maintain the deep connections with people that may not be in your time zone via text or phone call.
You give up roots to create a more complex web of memories, people and places.
Obvi, I am the latter of the two.
I grew up in the suburbs of Ohio, and at that time made the easy decision to go to school nearby at Miami University. It may have been living abroad in Luxembourg, traveling all over to places like Paris, Berlin, Monte Carlo, Amsterdam, Switzerland, Venice and Rome... that gave me the courage to then move to Chicago for the next 4 years.
P.S. All that glitters ain't gold I broke my foot my SECOND WEEK being abroad, so consider all of the above on Tiny Tim like crutches and a casted foot. HAWT & FUN.
In Chicago I fell deeply in love with my group of friends, and soon after Justin, who had lived in New York City at the time. Justin's from D.C., and I had actually met him once 4 years prior in Alabama. He was visiting Chicago one weekend when I was there. reached out, 7 months and a whole lot of texts and trips later I was moving to New York City. Two years of huge growth, travel to places like Patagonia and South Africa, a whole lot of life change, and we were packed to move to the beach in California where we live now.
So I haven’t stayed in one place to, say, be there in the flesh for every big moment my friends have. Although it’s super easy to get on the phone, or on the plane, it’s of course different than steady relationships you can have with people you live in the same city with.
Although moving of course gives you a unique perspective, and I have accumulated a variety of experiences and friends through each move, it’s always interesting to think if I had stayed in one place, what my life would be like.
I have always been the onward and upward, keep-it-movin’, never satisfied type. I think moving also has helped satisfy a constant desire to travel. Part of the reason L.A. was enticing to me was the fact we can hit Australia, New Zealand, Asia and the rest of the west coast spots much easily.
But I haven’t been in Cincinnati to see my best friend graduate business school, or in Chicago to see my friends move into bigger and better places, or New York City where promotions are happening and my homies are hustlin', I feel connected deeply to each person rather than each place.
I definitely don’t know which option is better, and i think that each person has made the best decision that fits for them. Whether it’s to stay in one place and set deep roots, or to keep it moving like a tumbleweed, LOL But it’s for real been on my mind.
What do you think? Which camp are you in? It’s like I’m asking on the phone ha, would love to hear your thoughts.
Talk soon people, I love you!