So you guys know Justice, right? I don’t talk about my relationship much because it’s so sacred to me, and honestly I value our independence so much. I want to be known for being me, first, not someone for just being a partner to someone else.
Among other things.
But in short Justice is my soulmate, the best part of my life and the thing I am most proud of. It’s been 5 years, 2 coasts and so many laughs. He’s gorgeous, smart, kind and funny. PERFECTION.
Through our moves, job changes, career changes, life changes, we’ve had times of insane stress and change. Which for most, lead to fights, and arguments about nothing.
I remember when we first moved to LA, lots was happening and we both were feeling unsure of the move, so we were fighting a bit. Arguing and roommate problems. 4 years living together things.
I don’t know what it was, maybe a conversation with Lindsey, or deep in a meditation session, but it hit me that if Justin was the person I loved the most, I needed to treat him that way.
Before in relationships I would say that those closest to me always felt my wrath if I was stressed or things weren’t going my way. It’s like I would take them for granted, with the assumption that they’d always be there because they loved me. Maybe I didn’t always give my best self or the best version of me.
I don’t know if it’s what I saw at home, but I realized that if someone asked me who I loved and cherished the most, it would be Justin, no doubt. If that was true, I needed to always remember to treat him that way. Treat him as if he is the greatest thing. No matter how long it’s been, always be kind, always be patient, and assume the best.
Right now whenever I am with him, I seriously think about treating him the very best that I can. That’s going out of my way regularly to make life easier for him, to think about all the things I love about him and tell him, and to be sure that I am centered, confident and loving myself first.
It’s also the meditation that has given me space between my emotions and my reactions. Because we are not our emotions, those are fleeting, and they are passing, so when I see the Chipotle bag on the counter after he’s eaten dinner 4 hours ago, and doesn’t want to throw it out for some reason I don’t know, it’s those seconds that meditation gives me to remember what REALLY matters. Me throwing that bag away without saying shit because that’s what I would want him to do for me. If I want someone to be forgiving, kind, and patient with me, I need to be forgiving, kind and patient with them.
It’s been so amazing to grow and to fall so madly in love with this kid, he is truly perfect in my eyes and what I am most proud of in my life. Excited to see what 2018 has in store, and continue leveraging him as a mirror to my personal growth and self-development.
Make sense? Let me know how you are in your relationships. Do you sometimes take them for granted?